My driving lesson went well yesterday, I'm getting the hang of the controls. Another lesson today so hopefully ideas will be starting to wire up in my mind. I do end up feeling quite seriously tired though. I obviously haven't concentrated that much for a while!
I did a good clean of the house also yesterday, whilst making Jack a mix tape for his van. It felt very 90's and was a good excuse to revisit and listen to a lot of old music. My house hold have been mostly at the land in Durham. Where Jack is building a roof for a third floor straw bale house. Its been cold on nights without there sunny presence.
Last night I went to Clara and John's down the road for a Chinese take away. Emma came over and it was just like old times, including the little sisterly misunderstandings of language that peppered our communication. We feasted then all got into Clara's bed in her new beautiful red room for a catch up.
A funny thing happened yesterday as I was musing over music. This lady watched me as she walked around my house, I smiled and she summoned me to the door. Then she stood and pleaded with me for money in another language. Even though I didn't know what she was saying it was easy to get the gist. I made the spur of the moment decision to apologise and be kind but to say no. She may of been in trouble, but there was something in the way she summoned me to her door that made me feel a little protective.
It did make me think about a particular Rumi poem at Earthing the spirit about welcoming people in.
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival
A joy a depression, a meanness
Some momentary awareness
Comes as an unexpected visitor
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows
Who violently sweep your house of it's furniture.
Still, treat each guest honourably,
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight
The dark thought, the shame,
The malice, meet them all at the
door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes
Because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
I have always had a problem with not giving to people begging as if I may be denying God. I slowly stopped this thought as it wasn't inspired by love, but more out of sadness. Its interesting to read this poem again as I realise its a lot to do with the self. Welcoming all aspects of the self, to clear out and make way for 'some new delight.'
I do think that people and relationships are often mirrors. That means I'm more selective wrongly or rightly of who I welcome in. I wont be unkind to someone, but giving money doesn't feel like giving in a whole way. I'd rather offer my time, it means more.
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